Stumble Upon

[Jeff]

Just noticed this over at Crazy Asian Drink link referrals:

http://www.stumbleupon.com/refer.html

yay! Unless it was one of us who referred ourselves. Then, um, yay?

[YouStink]

No one even comes onto this site, so I guess I don't have to worry about restricting myself.

What the frig is this. You guys aren't even asian, but you diss our stuff. why don't you take a look at your drinks for a change. if they aren't horrible tasting to US, then they sure are unhealthy. no wonder americans have the highest obesity. take into account that your tastes are different than ours. What, are you guys so stuck to gulping down your own sodas and beer that you haven't had a chance to taste the other side of the Earth? Geez, the whole world does not revolve around you. Maybe if you drink tea every day, the thought of drinking bubble tea would be sweet. Anyway, Asians are known for living the longest - part of that goes because of tea. And those pearls inside the drink? Some people enjoy eating tapioca too, maybe you should go try it sometime. Just because it looks "disgusting", doesn't mean that it is, either. At least Asian food does not consist of taking a whole bunch of preservatives and coloring and cramming them into tiny rectangular shapes, or mixing food coloring and loads of unnatural flavoring and calling it a drink. All right, the boba tea that you drank was canned, which probably decreases the quality of the taste, but do you realize that just because you don't like it, you have to show the whole world?! Maybe some of us don't agree. Maybe it's you who is disgusting.

[Jeff]

Awesome! I bet this indignant Asian stumbled upon us because of Stumble Upon! Sweet!

My favorite part is when he/she bitches about our comments after trying the drinks and then tells us maybe we should try it sometime!


What the frig is this. You guys aren't even asian, but you diss our stuff.

Who says we have to be Asian to have commentary on Asian drinks? Dammit. Must be another rule I missed cause I didn't read my Handbook to Life.


why don't you take a look at your drinks for a change.

Because American drinks don't fit into the category of 'Asian drinks', crazy or not.


if they aren't horrible tasting to US, then they sure are unhealthy.

Yep! Unhealthy! But they aren't horrible tasting to you! See? Also, they aren't evil (the sodas themselves, not the corporations that produce them)


no wonder americans have the highest obesity.

Yes, it is our love for non-Asian drinks. It's probably because Americans are selfish gluttons, actually.


take into account that your tastes are different than ours.

I think that's what the whole page is about.

What, are you guys so stuck to gulping down your own sodas and beer that you haven't had a chance to taste the other side of the Earth?

This sounds vaguely pornographic but... didn't you just read the page? We drank the drinks!


Geez, the whole world does not revolve around you.

Your opinion.


Maybe if you drink tea every day, the thought of drinking bubble tea would be sweet.

Actually, that jerk Brent loves Bubble Tea! It's probably why the site isn't updated anymore! He switched sides! The jerk! And, you're right. If I liked tea, I might actually like half of the drinks we tasted. Most of them are just tea with a little something catchy thrown in the mix.


Anyway, Asians are known for living the longest - part of that goes because of tea.

Actually, I think its Swedes or Finns or something that are 'known for' living the longest. Asians are known for tentacle sex and karate.


And those pearls inside the drink? Some people enjoy eating tapioca too, maybe you should go try it sometime. j

Our trying it is what caused this angry outburst!


Just because it looks "disgusting", doesn't mean that it is, either.

That's why we imbibed it! To see if it tasted like it looked!


At least Asian food does not consist of taking a whole bunch of preservatives and coloring and cramming them into tiny rectangular shapes, or mixing food coloring and loads of unnatural flavoring and calling it a drink.

Actually, some of these drinks did just that. Perhaps that is part of the reason they were so bad. But hey! If you're ever in Portland, I'd love to try some of these drinks fresh at a local eatery. Your treat, of course!


All right, the boba tea that you drank was canned, which probably decreases the quality of the taste, but do you realize that just because you don't like it, you have to show the whole world?!

We thought it would be funny to show the whole world!


Maybe some of us don't agree. Maybe it's you who is disgusting

Dammit. Now I'm going to cry.

[zer0]

At least Asian food does not consist of taking a whole bunch of preservatives and coloring and cramming them into tiny rectangular shapes, or mixing food coloring and loads of unnatural flavoring and calling it a drink.

Hey, I ever relate my latest new dream to you guys? I'd like to breed or genetically modify a new type of sausagedog without legs! It'd slither! Slither like a SNAKE! Just like a fucking SNAKE! Also, it would have a forked tounge! And breathe fire!! Take that, oh meager adding of food coloring and unnatural tastes!

[Unregistered1]

Awesome! I bet this indignant Asian stumbled upon us because of Stumble Upon! Sweet!

You're not funny. You're a motherfucking disgrace to the fucking Americans here. You and your racist site.


My favorite part is when he/she bitches about our comments after trying the drinks and then tells us maybe we should try it sometime!

Well, lookie here. I'm doing the same. Except maybe the last part. Nobody really fucking cares what the fuck you think, you fucking homo. You might as well go fuck yourself for the gayness of it.


Yep! Unhealthy! But they aren't horrible tasting to you! See? Also, they aren't evil (the sodas themselves, not the corporations that produce them)

What the fuck are you smoking. You can't prove shit that this is unhealthy. (well, if one of your gay lovers die, then I guess that's a point.)


I think that's what the whole page is about.

You don't have to make a motherfucking site about you disliking a drink, dumb shitface. Keep it to your small fucking brain.


Actually, that jerk Brent loves Bubble Tea! It's probably why the site isn't updated anymore! He switched sides! The jerk! And, you're right. If I liked tea, I might actually like half of the drinks we tasted. Most of them are just tea with a little something catchy thrown in the mix.

At least Brent has some good taste, you filthy bastard.


Our trying it is what caused this angry outburst!

And my foot up your white ass is gonna end it, bitch.


That's why we imbibed it! To see if it tasted like it looked!

Again, you didn't have to making a fucking website, you assclown.


We thought it would be funny to show the whole world!

erm...ok. So it'd be funny if we showed the whole fucking world how gay this country is. ok.


Dammit. Now I'm going to cry.

Yeah, go cry to your momma, fucker.

[Jeff]

That's fucking my fucking favorite fucking post ev-fucking-er by fucking Amy's fucking husband!

[zer0]

Man, nothing beats hate mail!

[Ken]

At least he got the part about Jeff's being gay right.

[Jeff]

Oh yeah? Just wait until I post your and Dave's gay webcam action here!

[Brent]

Actually, that jerk Brent loves Bubble Tea! It's probably why the site isn't updated anymore! He switched sides! The jerk!Is good, is good, the bubble tea. Well, that is, if the tapioca's fresh, which it hasn't been the last few times I've had it, which is why I'm not drinking much of it anymore. Stupid bastards, passing off their day-old crap on me. I ain't gonna buy that shit.


At least Brent has some good taste, you filthy bastard.Ugh. I hate when losers make me look bad by agreeing with me.

When is somebody out there going to create a "Crazy American Websites" page that totally disses us? It'd be funnier than reading through all this too-serious shit from Asians and rants from homophobic Asian-wannabe white boys pulling the classic "I'll kick your ass" card on an Internet forum.

No, I'll kick your ass! EWWWWWWWWW.... CLOWNED!

[Jeff]

I also like where the guy is so angry he gets mad at me for agreeing that American drinks are unhealthy.

[UStink]

Okay. You think these drinks taste bad. But why do you have to label all the "disgusting" drinks as "Asian"? You can't just make a stereotype. That's really the one thing that pisses me off.

[Jeff]

You may have missed the point of the page. The point is to try 'drinks' made in 'Asia' that we think sound 'crazy'. We've considered shopping around for Indian drinks since we've drank almost everything in the beverage section in my favorite Japanese store, Uwajimaya. Indian, as you'll note, is still on the continent of Asia.

We could do crazy European drinks or crazy African drinks or, as many enraged people note, crazy American drinks. But we chose to do Asian drinks.

Part of the reason? Because I, at least, love Japan. And part of my time spent in Japan, China and Singapore convinced me that the different tastes of those cultures versus the American culture was quite extreme.

And another helpful hint about comedy and criticism. It's always easier to bash something than to be funny about how thrilled you are.

Also, as Brent still drinks bubble tea on occasion, I have had Milkis more than just the one time. It's not bad. Weird and crazy, sure! But not bad!

Also, Pocari Sweat is as bad as we wrote. I thought it would be refreshing and it wasn't. But that doesn't mean I'm pro-Gatorade. It's just we decided to write about Asian drinks.

Is this also a stereotype? Japan has the best candy in the world! Oh, shit! I'm being racist!

We should do a Canadian Snack Food page! Talk about nuts!

[zer0]

Also, let's not forget that I am Swedish, but consistently bash America on this forum. Also, I bashed the UK in my review of "Forbidden Siren" (http://www.noapologiespress.com/zer0comics/Sirenreview.htm). OH NOES!1! I must be RACIST!!! Hey, UStink and Unregistered1; aren't you going to start to criticize me for being so obviously biased against America and it's culture?! I feel your hypocritical pseudoliberal tendencies practically DEMANDS it! Don't disappoint me, now!

[Brent]

Well, truth be told, if zer0 weren't so Anglophobic, we wouldn't want him around. Cuz we hate ourselves! Our expressions of contempt of everything we behold are reflections of our shriveled, quailing hearts gasping for lack of courage and conviction!

Or something like that.

[zer0]

You mean you just project your lack of self-worth upon others? For shame!

And what's this bullshit about "not wanting me around otherwise"? YOU SUCK, YANKEE! YOU ALL DO!!! YOUR WHOLE FRIGGIN' COUNTRY!!!

[Unregistered82]

I ran into this conversation because I was trying to findout "What the heck is Thunderbird?!" I first want to thankyou because I have been educated... But not only that, I thoroughly enjoyed your conversation started by the "hate mail." It's refreshing to know I am not the only one who runs into the people who get anal about of something they misunderstood.

Also, you remarks in regards to the original 'hate" letter were the greatest thing I've read. I finally found someone more sarcastic than myself... BRAVO!!

[Jeff]

Thanks for the unconditional love, support and money, Unregistered82! *ahem*money*ahem*

[Brent]

*hema*sex*hema*

[passerby]

Well, I'm an asian and I think your site is quite hilarious even though I like some of the drinks you've shown. Some...I've never heard of, but because of your review in how disgusting they are, made me want to try them out for myself. So, you might be helping with the marketing rather than preventing people away (not that I'm saying that's your intention).

But really..."Asians are known for tentacle sex and karate" (sorry I dunno how to insert quote things in post). I'm quite offended...but don't really care. There's other things I was a bit erk about, but couldn't be arsed to complain.

Ta anyway, but can I suggest an "Asian drinks that we don't really mind" section, unless that completely defeats the point of your site. Ah well, just a suggestion.

[Brent]

Yeah, it does defeat it! Sheeeesh!

We're definitely helping those companies with their drinks. Once every couple of months we receive emails from store owners and distributors asking how they can get their hands on them. Not that I know so I can't help them, but you know...

[bias anyone?]

hmm...just looks like closed mindedness and bias

i even stumbled onto one that it looked like you ACTUALLY enjoyed, but you just said that it was the least disgusting of the other ones that you've tried?

and milkis...from north korea? right dumbass...i'm sure that an isolationist country that won't let anything/anyone in or out makes the an exception when it comes to a soft drink? are you retarded?...but wait, you've already answered with a web site dedicated to semi-pc racism?

if you're going to judge something and you already know that you're going to give it a bad review...wouldn't it be a better idea to not drink it at all and just make the broader statement: "i'm a racist moron with nothing better to do with my time than let people know that i don't like the products from any country dominated by a 'person of color'"

and i know you're going to try to come back at this with "but if an asian person has 'asian pride', it's ok but if a white person has 'white pride' it's being racist"

and to the response that i'm sure you've used before and you're just saving up for later, white pride advertises the fact that you hate all other nations and cultures, while for example asian pride celebrates the culture that asians have despite the fact that they're in a society that almost forces them to conform to their standards and "culture" or rather, lack of...


but you reply to these posts like you've got something going for you? so you just respond in a passive agressive manner, that's just dripping with sarcasm? right...

you got the bright idea of critiquing asian drinks? good for you...so what's the point of this web site then? seriously? just to belittle people? wow...your welfare check doesn't make you feel good enough about yourself, so you fill the rest of the gap with predjudice? good idea...

i've eaten a lot of disgusting kinds of foods of non-asian cultures, but i didn't make a web site devoted to how much i hated them, and furthermore, i didn't sample foods or drinks from other cultures with the sole purpose of telling the world that i think that they're bad, regardless of how good or bad it was, everyone must know it's not from my country of origin, and that based on that fact, it is terrible


but...i'm not sure many people take your web site seriously...just there's a picture of a guy dressed like a princess and someone else with a big wet stain on the bottom of his shirt? perhaps he lacks full bladder control?...and...jordie laforge from star trek...sporting a hoodie...? and an ugly expression?



and i see that you're trying to knock the fact that asians are known for...tentacle sex and karate?....well americans were the first to have pornography...asians are just better at it...and karate? white people tried to make a fighting style but all they came up with was boxing...and i'm telling you that asian martial arts are much more effective...don't be upset because asians are better at both sex AND fighting...and i'm expecting you to say something about penis size...but it's all about proportion to your hands and general height, one nationality isn't naturally more well endowed

i already responded...yes! i DID predict your next feebly composed response!

[Brent]

Uh, did anyone read that? I tried but, well, by the second sentence, it was pretty obvious the poster missed the point.

[zer0]

Don't worry, he's not the only one who takes things too seriously. (http://www.noapologiespress.com/zer0comics/maddoxjoke.htm)

[Ken]

Ugh. Can you imagine if we actually abandoned the sarcasm and reviewed things realistically? How boring would that be? 80% of the drinks we try taste just like half a dozen other drinks we've tried--bland tea or bland coffee or blandly sweet sugar water. The commonality: blandness. Yeah, those reviews would be exciting to read if we were doing real reviews.

I don't even know why I bother trying to explain ourselves, so I won't go into depth--if you don't get sarcasm, and you don't get the whole point of the "review site" (come on, people, this is not the Food section of the NY Times, for Christ's sake!)--then you are not going to understand what I'm saying here either. So continue to send us your complaints about how we Americans have no sense of taste, or how we are racist, or how we are closed-minded, or how we should pick on American drinks, or how we should find different day jobs, and we'll just continue to shake our heads at you, sadly, knowing that yet another person out there has missed the point of everything. Again. Bravo.

[zer0]

You Americans have no sense of taste, and you are racist, and you are closed-minded, and you should pick on American drinks, and you should find different day jobs!

[Jeff]

I like how my joke about tentacle sex and karate finally was turned against me. Even though it was a humorous reply to a positive stereotype (racist?) that was applied to Asians. Took long enough! Jerks!

Brent, I'll make you read his entire post by commenting on his point by point. Ha ha! Cause I know you'll want to read what I have to say! Because I'm a racist genius! Oops, did I type that in a public forum? Good thing I'm only a minor elected official that goes by a pseudonym, so no worries here! I'll never lose my public, tax-funded city council job because of this!

Anyway, skip the next post if you never really want to read what that one guy with issues posted.

[Jeff]

hmm...just looks like closed mindedness and bias

Sure, 'looks like'. But don't judge a gook by its cover. Oops, I meant book! Wow, good thing I can edit that out later or it might be considered Freudian or something. Even though I'm much more Jungian than Freudian. The Collective Unconscious is closed-minded and bias-y. Biasish? Biasically. Ha ha.

Also, the month I spent travelling all over Asia was only so I could use it later to defend my racist ways by insisting that I actually love all things Japanese, many things Chinese, lots of things Thailandish and most things Singaporan (except for being fined and killed for bringing drugs into the country). I don't include other Asian countries because I really don't know much about them. I apologize for not spending as much time as possible studying about Korea or Vietnam just so Koreans and Vietnamese wouldn't be offended by my not knowing much about the countries.

Plus, fuck you.


i even stumbled onto one that it looked like you ACTUALLY enjoyed, but you just said that it was the least disgusting of the other ones that you've tried?

Yeah, I think I pointed that out in my last really long post. Amazing, hunh? Seriously, though, most of those drinks are just tea with something added. And I hate tea. I hate Japanese tea. I hate English tea. I hate Indian tea. Yuck yuck yuck.


and milkis...from north korea? right dumbass...i'm sure that an isolationist country that won't let anything/anyone in or out makes the an exception when it comes to a soft drink? are you retarded?...but wait, you've already answered with a web site dedicated to semi-pc racism?

That's what I thought when I read Brent's review! Dumbass! You're going to cause our reviews to lack credibility by stating that a drink was actually exported from North Korea! Even though you do mention it's a weapon against free people's everywhere. And the fact that it was distributed secretly and on the black market (even if you didn't say that, I can tell you meant it). But still, I just knew some guy would use it against us!

Also, how is our racism semi-pc? Can that adjective be used on that noun without causing a minor tear in reality? I think not! I hope hmm bias? was sucked into a dimension filled with American soft drinks that lasted only three months on the market.


if you're going to judge something and you already know that you're going to give it a bad review...wouldn't it be a better idea to not drink it at all and just make the broader statement: "i'm a racist moron with nothing better to do with my time than let people know that i don't like the products from any country dominated by a 'person of color'"

That's a good idea for a web page! But then it wouldn't be true if we just posted that statement instead of letting the world know about the products we didn't like by countries dominated by '[people] of color'. Why the quotes around that, anyway? Also, is not white a color? Actually, white is the blending of ALL colors! And how do you know we're white, anyway? Hmm, just because we look white? Big mistake, buddy! That's racist! Ken and Brent may be big scary white European jerks who make fun of my Spanish-American heritage! A heritage where I learned how to say things like Mal Nino! and Hace frio! and Ich bin giler als eine Zeige! So, who's the racist now?

Yeah, I don't really know either.


and i know you're going to try to come back at this with "but if an asian person has 'asian pride', it's ok but if a white person has 'white pride' it's being racist"

Funny how you'd pick the one argument none of us would ever use. Although, now that you've claimed we'd use it, we can't successfully deny that we'd never have used it either. Well done, Socrates!


and to the response that i'm sure you've used before and you're just saving up for later, white pride advertises the fact that you hate all other nations and cultures, while for example asian pride celebrates the culture that asians have despite the fact that they're in a society that almost forces them to conform to their standards and "culture" or rather, lack of...

Whoops! By continuing with your argument, you've just messed up any success you had! Too bad, Plato! You obviously just used the white pride line to stigmatize us (or stigmatatize us, which I prefer). Asian pride is pretty close to being racist also. White pride is racist because it is about whites versus 'people of color' (to use your inexplicable quotes). 'Asian pride' (again, to use your inexplicable quotes) is pride in being Asian versus other people. Now, if you said Chinese Pride or Japanese Pride or Irish Pride (no bombs) or Spanish Pride or German Pride (no Nazis), you'd have a point. But you don't.

You also go on to accuse America of being a society that almost forces [others] to conform to their standards and "culture" (you use the quotes correctly here and then go on to be redundant with your 'or rather, lack of'. Dumb dumb!) As if other cultures weren't the same way! Social oppression and cultural peer pressure is the only way to keep specific societies remaining specific. Not that it's right or wrong, really. It's just what happens in society. When you comment on America's lack of culture, what you're really saying is 'My point I just used is actually invalid because America doesn't have a culture to force others to conform to. I am a big dumb dumb head.' Good job, Aristotle!


but you reply to these posts like you've got something going for you? so you just respond in a passive agressive manner, that's just dripping with sarcasm? right...

Don't you call us passive ag[g]ressive, you cunty cunty McCunthead! Fucker! Fuck You! Fucking dick I hope you choke on a soy bean, you piece of shit McChickenCuntFuck Fucker! Strangle on a blueberry, you tart!

Hmm, was that better? Or was that still passive ag[g]ressive because it was sarcastic? Damn, another point for you!


you got the bright idea of critiquing asian drinks? good for you...so what's the point of this web site then? seriously? just to belittle people? wow...your welfare check doesn't make you feel good enough about yourself, so you fill the rest of the gap with predjudice? good idea...

Wow, there are so many stellar arguments in this paragraph! First, you use the tried and true, 'so what's the point'. Usually, this is a debate killer. It's like a Sleeper Hold (if you'll allow me to use a white trash simile). Obviously we haven't been clear about the page, so you respond with 'what's the point' and utterly destroy us! I explain again, and you say, 'what's the point' and bam! again I'm bitch slapped into submission.

It's a pretty good argument but Brent beat it with the 'I didn't even bother to read past line two' argument. Well argued, Brent! Thanks!

Also, the belittling people? When did we do that? I think we mainly attacked drinks (liquid, comes in can, not people), corporations (evil entities marketing poison, money grubbing whores, filled with people but, technically, not people) and governments (killer robots/aliens/10th dimensional lizard beings keeping mankind enslaved by created tension between differently acculturated Earthlings through evil drink products, definitely not people)

Also, the welfare slam is pretty good. It's not prejudiced or anything on your part.


i've eaten a lot of disgusting kinds of foods of non-asian cultures, but i didn't make a web site devoted to how much i hated them,

Hey, neither did we!


and furthermore, i didn't sample foods or drinks from other cultures with the sole purpose of telling the world that i think that they're bad, regardless of how good or bad it was, everyone must know it's not from my country of origin, and that based on that fact, it is terrible

Here's a typical reaction we get from readers. They think we're pro-American and the only reason we're anti-Asian drinks is because we love American drinks. Wrong.

Geography Tip #1: Asia is not a country.


but...i'm not sure many people take your web site seriously...just there's a picture of a guy dressed like a princess and someone else with a big wet stain on the bottom of his shirt? perhaps he lacks full bladder control?...and...jordie laforge from star trek...sporting a hoodie...? and an ugly expression?

A princess! Yes, an AMAZON PRINCESS! How dare you not recognize Wonder Woman! Somebody force more lack of American Culture down this guy's throat, STAT!

Yeah, that idiot with the stain. We call him Piss Boy. Or Brent.

And jordie laforge? Again, get me 10 CCs of lack of American Culture here! This guy doesn't know Captain Cold!

Hee hee. 'Sporting a hoodie'. That's dirty!


and i see that you're trying to knock the fact that asians are known for...tentacle sex and karate?....well americans were the first to have pornography...asians are just better at it...

Boy, I'd love to agree with you here. Because you claim America was first at something AND that they lack culture. But, truly, I'd have to say America (being only slightly past 225 years) did not come up with the concept of wacking off to images of sex.


i'm expecting you to say something about penis size...but it's all about proportion to your hands and general height, one nationality isn't naturally more well endowed

Is that the line you use on your disappointed girlfriends? Ha ha! You have a small penis! (And my use of 'you' is not a veiled reference to 'all asians'. I don't know your nationality. But I do know you have a small penis now, thanks to that TMI).

One last thing. It's only people who have issues with something within or about themselves who freak out over stuff other people say. Especially people who freak out over Crazy Asian Drinks. Let it go, man, let it go.

[j;asdlfkj]

hmm...i'm making breakfast right now, so i'm not going to argue every point

except for the one about asia not being a country? did i ever refer to it as a country? or was i just stating that it was the region from which these drinks that you say that you hated came from?

and all of your responses are sarcastic and they aren't really proper responses...just you trying to say "you're stupid" wow...some point you've got there...and you called me socrates AND aristotle? wow, that's almost redundant

and i know you'll say "yes, it IS a good point, blah blah blah" wow, very well thought out, i'm sure that a retarded 12 year old would use that one too...and if you're going to argue and say you won't...well, i just know better

[Brent]

Yeah, that idiot with the stain. We call him Piss Boy. Or Brent.Fuck you, bitch!

Dear Guest,

It's not that we wouldn't argue with you properly in response to a proper argument -- it's your sarcasm, anger, lack of coherency that's led Jeff to pull out the beat-down stick. In the first post you made (if it is the first, who knows?) you made it abundantly clear that you weren't interested in discussing anything, you just wanted to go on some sort of electron-wasting warpath.

Which isn't a bad thing. Jeff's particularly good at entertaining us with responses to such nonsense.

But don't expect a reasoned argument/discussion/back and forth when you aren't willing to participate.

[Jeff]

Boy, if I were he (which I'm glad I'm not) and I was only going to argue one point, I'd argue the small penis point and post a picture of my throbbing manhood.

But I'm starving right now so I don't have time to argue all the points (damn welfare check came in last Friday and I blew it on cigarettes and gambling this last weekend), so I'll just say this:

I also called you Plato, dumbass!

See, as I learned in the Edutainment Film, Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure, Socrates was the teacher of Plato, who in turn taught Aristotle. So it wasn't redundant! It was masterfully crafted to show how you at first seemed like the father of philosophy and then I lowered you to the student and then the student of the student! Hee hee hee. Man, I'm funny!

And I see you decided to stick with the line that I told you was a masterful debating tactic! Good work! Remember to use that on all forums! Let me remind you which line that is so you don't think it was the retarded 12 year old come on. I mean, come back.


and if you're going to argue and say you won't...well, i just know better

Touche! With an accent on the e. But I'm too lazy to figure out how to manipulate my keyboard to make that accent. Actually, I'm not lazy at all. But, being a retarded 12 year old on welfare, well, you know. I'm going to run in circles for awhile now. Bye!

[Jeff]

Damn. I forgot to say that thing where I score 3 points if I say it when the forum starts a new page.

[Jeff]

Hmm, bias? Are you still making breakfast?

[kljasdflkajsdf]

Hmm, bias? Are you still making breakfast?
huh whoops...i guess i kind of forgot about this whole deal...i suppose i just got side-tracked with life and such...but anyways...your "throbbing manhood"? the tip of my finger has "throbbed" before...but that was just because i jammed it...but i'd rather not see it...but of course, i'm sure you'd just give me a general idea by covering it up with a thimble?

[asdfasdf]

Fuck you, bitch!

Dear Guest,

It's not that we wouldn't argue with you properly in response to a proper argument -- it's your sarcasm, anger, lack of coherency that's led Jeff to pull out the beat-down stick. In the first post you made (if it is the first, who knows?) you made it abundantly clear that you weren't interested in discussing anything, you just wanted to go on some sort of electron-wasting warpath.

Which isn't a bad thing. Jeff's particularly good at entertaining us with responses to such nonsense.

But don't expect a reasoned argument/discussion/back and forth when you aren't willing to participate.

my sarcasm was only in response to his, so i'm sorry to be the one to tell you that i'm not the one that's in the wrong...and what responses of his would be entertaining for you? the ones where he compares me to old greek philosophers? yeah, i'm still reeling from that one

and don't call it non-sense just because you can't grasp the concept of equality

and what beat-down stick? i just see non-sensical drivel only in the form of an insult with no proper response to any one of my points, and criticizing me for calling whoever was dressed as wonder woman a princess...and mistaking the person wearing the "mr. freeze" or whoever constume for an even worse costume of jordie laforge...i'm sorry...this really is too much, this "beat down stick" of which you speak must be too much for me...this is almost as bad as when i got called a doodie head at recess...i'm still recovering from that shock as well

[Brent]

Coherency. You don't have it. Try it out for free of charge for seven days, at which point I'll need to bill you on a monthly basis. Everyone needs it! How can you get buy without it?!? Oh my Gosh! Oh my! I can't believe you haven't gotten an iPod, HDTV, Tivo or coherency yet! How do you live, Mr. ksaodifujakdfjaewthy8i!?!?!?

[Jeff]

You win, doodie head!

What I actually find amazing is the fact that I did respond to everything he said. And I responded with sincerity and humor. But because there was humor and because it wasn't the reaction he was looking for, it was not an acceptable answer to him.

Here's the way he reasons:

1. I hate Pocari Sweat.
2. Pocari Sweat was made by Asians.
3. Asians know karate.

Wait. That's how I reason. I have absolutely no idea how he reasons.