sup`

[izeyoi]

....sup`

[Brent]

People want to belong without a side of imposition.

[Ken]

Like me!

[Brent]

Heh. What I read is "Brent is gay Like me!"

[Jeff]

Maybe Brent reads everything starting with Brent is Gay! Ken, you broke his brain!

That explains why he was always yelling, "I'm not a fag!" at all the restaurant menus.

[Ken]

I want to belong without a side of imposition is what I said, Brent! Trying to get out of your gayness . . . sheez.

[Brent]

I can't remember anyone obsessing "gay" as much as you do, Ken. Does your wife know? Your brother-in-law? Is he giving you the winks?

[Jeff]

Ha ha ha! You are both so gay it's totally gay. Just stop with all the accusings and denials and hook up already! Like when y'all used to ditch Track practice and go share a malted.

[Brent]

Uh, of all our friends, if anyone was going to be gay, it'd be first Bob, then you, then Ken. And Ken's third only because he's Society's Poster Boy.

[Jeff]

I'd ask you to explain the reasons for your rankings but it's so obviously biased that I wouldn't believe your gay explanations anyway.

Sure, Bob was known as the Ether Bunny in the army and he would have eaten jizz on a cookie if someone had been gay enough TO jizz on the cookie. And he would do anything for Taco Bravo. And he did slide around naked in the showers with Kenny who actually is gay.

And, okay, so I flirt with guys and wear pink and have long hair and kissed Robbie and almost had gay sex on Ken's couch. But I only do all of that to make non-gay men uncomfortable!

But I'm not sure why Ken should be third on the list and not you!

[Brent]

Your dismissal of my rankings based on hard numbers, data and years of observation as bias rings of bias, you biased bias guy.

It's obvious why Ken is third -- he has sex with his phone more than he does his wife! Teh ghey!

[Jeff]

Ken has sex with his phone? Now, even if that is true, it hardly makes a person gay. Unless I'm picturing it wrong.

And all of the national polls rank you as the most biased biaser that ever had a biased opinion. SIR!

[zer0]

Man, NA!P is so gay we should adopt a "Don't ask - Don't have buttsex in public" -policy!

[Jeff]

I only wish I was gay! True story:

The aforementioned Kenny was hanging out in a park one day when he makes eye contact with this guy sitting by a tree. Now, I don't know how gaydar works or what kind of come hither looks must be made for this to happen, but Kenny walks over, unzips and gets a blow job from this guy. Afterward, he just goes back about his business.

Damn. You chicks need to learn this lesson! Where are my come get a blow job from me looks when I walk around the park? From chicks, I mean! Dumb chicks. They're dumb. And frigid.

[zer0]

I don't have anything at all against homosexuals, but the following shit just pisses me off immensly for some reason; I went to the same class as this chick whose boyfriend turned out to be plucking his fucking eyebrows. PLUCKING HIS GODDAMN EYEBROWS! When I overheard her tell a friend about this, it actually made me so angry that I asked her if he also breastfed their kid and if he'd ever been unfaithful towards her with another man. She wasn't to happy about that question. Man, metrosexuality sucks. Hard. What's the point of trying to adopt another persons sexual identity? Kinda like white suburban kids wanting to be black, y'know?

[izeyoi]

again I say.... sup'


Oh, and gay people should be slaughtered if they don't change their ways. Like child molesters

[Jeff]

Dude. Calm down. Can't a guy pluck his fucking eyebrows? Man!

But, never mind zer0! Look at this other psycho! I think he should have stopped at sup'! Or `sup. Or whatever. PSYCHO!

Sex is awesome. I have no problem with anybody having sex however they want. Even if it's with a cow or a child. Because sex is awesome! Or with a black person, even!*

*This message brought to you by the Jeff who isn't sure he should have typed that stuff even though he thought it was funny.

[zer0]

Dude. Calm down. Can't a guy pluck his fucking eyebrows? Man!

It wasn't just the eyebrows, maa-aan! The same guy also wore makeup! Makeup, dude! I mean, whatever happened to the whole "I'm a man of manly manliness" -look? I blame stuff like "Queer eye for the straight guy" for this, you know! That and the CIA! They're involved in this conspiracy somehow!


Oh, and gay people should be slaughtered if they don't change their ways.

I REALLY hope you didn't seriously mean that, but was instead making a shitty joke. I don't take well to stupid hate comments like that. Unless of course the hatred is directed against Swedish rap. Then I'm game!

[Jeff]

What's wrong with Make-up!?!?

Queer Eye is a good place to blame the 'I'm a Metrosexual' thing. As Americans, we don't like things if they don't fall into only two categories. So, Heterosexual = slob. Homosexual = Cares about his appearance.

Therefore, all these men who are really into making sure they look good and pedicured and body waxed are suddenly all scared that they're going to be thought of as gay. So, along comes some idiot to say, "Oh! I'm a um METROsexual!" That means I'm hetero but not a typical redneck slob hetero.

I think.

[zer0]

Why, there ain't nothing wrong with makeup - on a woman, that is.

Maybe it's just me, but I just don't understand straight guys using stuff like makeup and nail polish. I've never understood the logic behind that, even when it was hip back in the 17'th century.

I mean, a guy can still totally avoid being a slob without resorting to using foundation and lipstick. Basically, a guy can avoid being a slob without giving up being a guy. And having to prance around in makeup trying to "impress" the opposite sex is just not my idea of what being a man is all about. Sorry.

What kind of role models does a metrosexual have, anyway? Haven't they ever heard of James Bond? Man, he porks like 100 000 hot chicks every day while saving the universe from evil nuclear-powered hyper-intelligent robotic dictators, and he's never applied foundation or lipstick in his life! Well, at least the Sean Connery version of Bond hasn't. I'm not to sure about Pierce Brosnan. :)

[Jeff]

I've been known to wear lipstick and nail polish. Why? Because it's pretty. I'd also wear skirts if it wouldn't seem like a total cry for attention. Why? Because they're comfortable.

[zer0]

No they're not! Er, I mean, that's what a friend of mine told me. Who likes to wear skirts. Um, yeah.

[Jeff]

My favorite color is pink! Fluffy, furry pink. Actually, my favorite color is anything that is fluffy and furry and looks like a muppet.

Also, have you other noapologiespress email account dudes been having problems with your spam filter? None of my spam emails go to the spam folder anymore. Everything is just going to my normal inbox. Anybody else having this glitch-up?

[zer0]

Actually, I haven't been recieving a single damn spam email in, like, the last 2 weeks or so! Which is good, I guess. Guess it means that the spamfilter is upgraded. Or downgraded. Or something else entirely. I dunno; spamfilters aren't my strong side.

Have you tried checking the settings in your control panel? Maybe that'd help? Just a friendly tip, I don't really know what the problem might be!

[Jeff]

Yeah, I checked the filters. I even reapplied them just to see if the setting were just being wonky. Don't know if that's worked yet or not.

[Brent]

Nope. I'm getting the normal amount of spam since we moved to the new mail server, about 4-8 a day.

I'm also using Apple's Mail client, which has it's own spam filtering scheme, so I'm double-bagged.

[Jeff]

You misunderstand me, I think, Brent.

Is the spam you are getting being diverted into your spam folder? Mine has stopped being diverted. I get tons of spam in my normal folder.

Or is that what you meant by getting normal spam. That it is going into your spam folder?

[Brent]

Hmm... lemme check...

Well, looking at my spam folder via the web interface, it appears I've only received one spam email this weekend. Which is bullshit. I've emptied that folder and will check it out tomorrow or so.

If that continues for you, though, we'll have to let Dreamhost know.

[Ken]

I get almost no spam directly in my inbox. Yay!

[kendalchen]

Jeff really does like things that look like skinned muppets. (Also, hindu muppets)
Ask him about his pink furry houseslippery boots! They were so Jeff that I took him to the department store and said "Would you like these?" and he was as happy as a little girl. In a manner of speaking.
Ask him about the time he fell asleep with his feminine side up!

[Jeff]

Stop talking about my feminine side being up.

My spam filter is broken! None of it goes to my spam box anymore! Dumbys!

[Brent]

Weird. I haven't received any junk mail since last night's post. I've received four today in my inbox.

[Brent]

Spam folder is still empty, and received about 10 spam emails today, so I sent in an email to Dream Host asking for an explanation, etc.

[Brent]

Here's their reply:
As for spam, we use
Razor to check spam. Razor uses a world wide central database. If that database is down, like it is now, then spam checking won't work. There's not much we can do about that, other than write Razor and tell then to get their act together.

We are working on our OWN spam filtering system that will be built into webmail, so keep your eyes peeled for that!

[Jeff]

Cool.

I also received a great email from someone who said they wasted all day at work reading it from start to finish. So now I'm going to be guilted into updating! Sheesh!

[Brent]

Reading DL?

[Jeff]

Oh yeah. I guess I just thought some of what was supposed to be typed. Yeah. Dwarflover. Yeah. Hmm.

[izeyoi]

Originally posted by zer0

I REALLY hope you didn't seriously mean that, but was instead making a shitty joke. I don't take well to stupid hate comments like that. Unless of course the hatred is directed against Swedish rap. Then I'm game!

Oops.....

.....nah, I meant it...... seriously, I don't think they should be killed...just oppressed until they change their ways.....

[zer0]

That's because you're secretly homosexual yourself, right? And in deep denial about it?

[izeyoi]

Not really....


....more of a straight guy...




.....opress the homosexuals.....

...they threaten the family as we know it.....

....they would destroy the family

[Jeff]

My family is doing just fine destroying itself but thanks for the tip on homosexual family destruction in case my family ever needs it.

[zer0]

I dunno, I kinda think families are overrated. Too bad one can't choose one's own parents, y'know?

[izeyoi]

I dunno, I kinda think families are overrated. Too bad one can't choose one's own parents, y'know?

I'd choose your parents.

[zer0]

I'd be korving around all over town in a giant sausage-shaped hotrod that looks like a dachshund, yo.

[Carlos]

Nothing wrong with battys, fassies, chee-chee-boys, homos, lezzies, gaywads, and fruits.