NA!P Mascot

[Ken]

So Rahul wants to be our mascot. He says we can pimp his name and image however we want. Brent, do your thing. Lots of stuff can be found at www.rahulgupta.com (http://www.rahulgupta.com)

[Jeff]

Why is it 'Brent do your thing?' What is he going to do, write an article about how Rahul hates Bush? Man. See, you hurt my feelings and now here I am jumping all over Brent. You're the cause of hateful, hateful wars, Ken!

[zer0]

He he, It'd be pretty cool to make a "mascot"- page involving Rahul. I could draw a funny (and/or degrading) charicature of him in a silly "mascot" suit, and then all of you guys could come up with some funny shit to write on the page as well! Come on, get to work!

[Brent]

Do my thing. Yeah, whatever. Ken's like the bad rich kid in the teen romance flicks of the eighties who hasn't had to do anything ever.

This stuff takes.... time! And.... effort! And... planning!

[Jeff]

Oh yeah. Xan is our third mascot.

[Brent]

Who's the second? Or first? I'm so confused.

[Brent]

But whoever the first or second mascot is, maybe we can make them revolve whenever someone comes to the front page!

[Ken]

I think Rahul is our "let's pimp his image and name since he's quasi-famous" mascot. Robbie is our "let's make a silly pink costume and make him wear it around in public" mascot. And Xan is our "Steven likes to take pictures of her cleavage" mascot.

[zer0]

What about Nicole? She could be dressed as a koala and pop out of the pouch of a gigantic kangaroo!

[Jeff]

If Nicole wants to be a mascot, we have plenty of slots to fill! Especially ones for mascots that can do handstands!

[Nicole]

No, no mascoting for me thanks. My heydey is over.

[Brent]

Famous mascots only! Der! Like, uhm... Rahul.

I want Robbie Rist of Cousin Oliver fame. Someone get me Robbie Rist of Oliver fame, immediately!

I wish Wil Wheaton had taken me up on my offer all those years ago... sigh...

[Nicole]

What about Scott Baio? Can we have Cha-chi as the mascot?

[Brent]

Oh MAMA, that'd be hot.

For Ken, that is.

[Gillman]

I humbly concede in the race for mascot. I can't beat ER.

[Jeff]

See what you did, Brent? You elitist! You lost our only mascot who would actually do stuff for us for some lame-ass mascot (no offense, Rahul!) who is only lending an image!

I vote Robbie as Official NA!P Mascot!

And we need to get Xan to do a Romance Page.

[Brent]

As CEO, President, Emperor and some other stuff, I officially veto you! Because as sweet as Gillman would be as mascot, image is everything. Just as Sprite. Rahuuuuuuuuuul!

[Jeff]

You have no veto power! Besides, you stole most of those titles from me. Except CEO. I'm never a CEO. I would never use that term in any article I ever wrote neither.

[Brent]

No way! The only title you used before me was High Priestess! You can be High Priestess all you want.

I'm also King, Khan, Caesar, Czar, Kunig, Chief, Editor-in-Chief, Rock Star of the State, Shogun, El Presidente, El Jefe, Master Architect, Lead Guitarist, Executive Producer, etc.

Ken's Publisher

[Jeff]

Sure, if you want to label yourself.

[zer0]

I'm "postmodern foreign person". That ranks higher than both "emperor" and "CEO". Ha!